If you think you lack privacy when you go to college and share a 10-foot by 12-foot dorm room with a stranger, wait until you have kids. Gone are the days of cooking, sleeping, and going to the bathroom in peace. Usually, you deal with these breaches of privacy in the comfort of your own home. But for one dad and his four-year-old daughter, their bathroom time got very, very public.
Clint Edward's runs a blog called "No Idea What I'm Doing: A Daddy Blog" where he shared a very personal story of how his daughter helped him deal with a bout of diarrhea on a road trip. Clint's story is both heartwarming and gross, which pretty much sums up what it's like to be a parent.
It Started Out As A Normal Roadtrip
Meet husband, author, and full-time dad Clint Edwards. Clint, his wife Mel, and their three children set off on a 12-hour road trip across Oregon to attend a wedding.
Halfway through the trip, they stopped for gas and some snacks. Mel stayed in the van with the two oldest children, while Clint and his youngest daughter Aspen went inside the gas station.
Clint Felt Something Bad Coming On
Suddenly, the feeling of imminent diarrhea struck. He was not sure why it was happening, but at this point, there was no turning back.
As we all know, when the feeling hits, you have to make some life-or-death split-second decisions. Clint had to only a few seconds to decide his fate.
He Made A Break For The Restroom And Had To Bring His Daughter With Him
At that point, Clint decided to make a b-line for the restroom. He had no choice but to drag Aspen away from the corn flakes and into the stall with him.
It was a close call, and now he was stuck in a gas station restroom with just him, his diarrhea, and his four-year-old daughter.
Aspen Had A Front Row Seat For The Show
According to Clint, Aspen watched very politely as he struggled on the toilet. Aspen stood there, "Moana light-up crocs on the wrong feet, blue eyes wide, and supportive."
Then Aspen Decided To Start Cheering Clint On
Out of nowhere, Aspen decided to start cheering him on. Clint wrote that she began yelling, "Good job, Daddy! Good job! You make two poops! Now three poops! I'm four!"
Well, at least you know she's an expert at counting. If Aspen doesn't go into motivational speaking, she could try a career in math.
She Even Started Color Commentating The Entire Thing
But it got even more bizarre when Aspen switched from generally supportive comments to a detailed description on Clint's diarrhea experience.
As if the other people in the restroom couldn't already hear what was going on, Clint said that "she commented on the size, smell, and sound. Say things like "wow!" and "you're trying too hard!"
Clint Actually Had To Hold Her Back From Getting A Closer Look
Aspen was getting so into commenting on her father's diarrhea, that at one point he even had to push her face away from the business end of things.
I'm not sure why she wanted to get a closer look. Maybe she thought that other people in the restroom were just as invested in her dad's bowel movements as she was.
But Aspen Wasn't Nice About Everything
Unfortunately for Clint, he wasn't receiving only supportive words and cheering. Aspen was kind enough to let him know, "Yucky, Daddy. It's stinky." And that he was a "pooping-farting robot." That was the moment when a man in the stall beside Clint burst out in laughter.
Eventually, It Passed
Like any terrible bout of diarrhea, eventually it passed. Clint tried to swallow his pride and get back to feeling like a normal human again.
They left the restroom. Clint with his head hung low, and Aspen feeling like the entire thing was perfectly normal. They bought the corn flakes, some anti-diarrhea pills, and headed back to the car.
Clint Tried To Forget About The Entire Thing, But Aspen Had Different Plans
Naturally, once they got back to the car, his wife and two oldest children wanted to know why the heck it took so long. Clint just mumbled "you don't want to know," but his daughter had a different idea.
She jumped right into telling the entire family about the restroom experience while Clint sat there silently.
Clint Had Never Felt So Supported
Even though it was embarrassing, Clint admitted that he'd never felt so supported in his entire life. He told us that Aspen is fully potty trained, but easily distracted and still prone to accidents.
Clint and Mel still give positive reinforcement each time she goes to the restroom successfully. Clearly, she picked up the habit.
At The End Of It All, His Wife Was Just As Supportive As Aspen
They headed back on the road for a long and embarrassing car ride. After Mel finally stopped laughing, she patted Clint's leg and said "Nice work, Daddy." If the entire experience taught Clint anything, it's that even in his darkest moments, he'll always have the (sometimes undesired) support of his family.
Facebook Loved Clint's Relatable Parenting Story
As embarrassing, ridiculous, and overly-candid as Clint's story was, it was surprisingly relatable to most of the parents who follow his blog. Anyone with kids knows that privacy doesn't exist until they turn into moody teenagers.
Many parents were quick to let Clint know just how funny, awkward, and relatable his story was.
People Were Quick To Let Clint Know He Wasn't Alone
People even began to share their own candid bathroom stories to prove that Clint's experience was not a unique one.
The fact that Melanie's kid was trying to disguise her grunts and groans is proof that children are somewhat aware that bathroom time can be embarrassing. Some just choose not to care.
Because Bathroom Details Are Always Public Information
It's already a well-known fact that kids have no filter and will say whatever is on their mind to anyone at any time. We often don't notice it because the topics aren't very private. No parent cares if they tell a stranger about how much they love Frozen.
We only ever notice the moments where their unfiltered comment turns around and embarrasses us.
And Parents Aren't Always The Victims
You don't even need to be a parent to know that children have no boundaries when it comes to bathroom time. Anyone who has been in a public restroom while a child is openly discussing their bowel movements will understand that with kids, anything goes.
Even Teenagers Can Get Candid
It's not just the four-year-olds who are still working on being entirely potty trained who like to get candid in public restrooms. Pamela proves that bathroom time is never sacred, no matter how old you get.
I just feel bad for the poor soul who was stuck in between Pamela and her daughter.
The Parents With Serious, Secretive Kids Are Lucky
On the flip side of things, there is always one lucky parent out there who gets the child who likes some privacy in the bathroom.
As a parent, you might wonder if you birthed a strange, secretive kid, but cherish it while you can. Be thankful that you'll never have your diarrhea color commentated in a public restroom.
It's A Nice Reminder That Kids Are Smarter Than We Think
All the Facebook comments and replies are a gentle reminder to parents that children are way smarter than we give them credit. Most of the things they do, they subconsciously learn from us.
Sometimes it's cheering on your poops, but other times it's a swear word and sassy comment.
At Least Our Children Will Always Keep Us Humble
If anything, all the crazy and candid things that our kids do will keep their parents humble. Since children have no filter, they are never afraid to speak the truth and put us in our place.
It can shock and surprise us, but we know that at the end of the day, our kids love us just as much as we love them.
